Hypothetical Top Gear Challenge: The Eurafrica Special.

"not for canada - australian in disguise" (for-canada) 08/29/2016 at 17:22 • Filed to: HYPOTHETICAL TOP GEAR CHALLENGES

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You start in Cape Town, South Africa.

You have 100 thousand South African Rand to buy yourself a vehicle on Cape Town’s local Gumtree classifieds.

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You then have to drive across some of the toughest conditions through Africa, and then across Europe and ending up at the northernmost place in Europe; Nordkapp, Norway.

So. What do you buy?

Personally, I’d go for the somewhat obvious choice.

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It’s a 1990 Toyota Hilux. I selected it, because as proved on the actual Top Gear, these things are literally indestructible. Africa and Europe stand no chance. These things have absolutely dominated Africa, so parts should be plentiful too if the planets align in a peculiar fashion and something actually goes wrong.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:32

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I might be forced to James May things and use a W123 Benz. Depends on the exact route. If I could bring a trailer of spares and the roads were more badder I’d probably go with a Series III, though.

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:32

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This:

http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-cars-bakkies…

Then I’d spend the rest on spare parts and a trailer.

For Sweden > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:34

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Why do you hate Gibraltar

not for canada - australian in disguise > For Sweden 08/29/2016 at 17:34

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DON’T ASK ME ASK GOOGLE.

S65 > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:34

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XJ Cherokee, I imagine parts will be a bit rarer there

http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-cars-bakkies…

not for canada - australian in disguise > S65 08/29/2016 at 17:36

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Does it come with the smiling moustache man?

not for canada - australian in disguise > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. 08/29/2016 at 17:37

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As a wise man once said: YOLO.

TheHondaBro > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:37

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You start in Cape Town, South Africa

The winner is whoever doesn’t have their car stolen.

S65 > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:38

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If it dosen’t I’m still taking him

not for canada - australian in disguise > S65 08/29/2016 at 17:39

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.

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:40

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Hey, if I’m going to die on a cross continental trip, I may as well die in a car that has some character.

InFierority Complex > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:41

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http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-cars-bakkies…

what could go wrong here? Nothing, the answer is nothing.

Die-Trying > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:42

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Range Rover expedition vehicle. R 40,000

MultiplaOrgasms > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:43

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Scenic RX4 lol

They’re AWD you know, and being french it is both comfortable and unkillable.

Viggen > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:43

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Holy shit that’s only like $7,000 USD. Gonna have fun with this. If the challenge were to hypothetically start this weekend, it would alter my purchase slightly, because it’s winter in Africa and summer in Norway.

Short-throw Granny Shifter is 2 #blessed 2b stressed > TheHondaBro 08/29/2016 at 17:43

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Not to mention driving dangerously close to an active warzone in Northern Nigeria.

I wonder how much money in bribes it would take to get from Angola to Algeria.

not for canada - australian in disguise > InFierority Complex 08/29/2016 at 17:44

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A two-stroke Saab isn’t actually THAT bad of an idea when you really think about it. Since it’s a two stroke, it’s gonna be damn simple to fix. On unpaved roads though, it might be a bit of a challenge. And so is finding parts. If you broke down somewhere like the Congo, you’re royally fucked.

not for canada - australian in disguise > MultiplaOrgasms 08/29/2016 at 17:46

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Driving across Africa in a French egg: What could possibly go wrong?

Suby555 > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:46

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Go watch “long way down” and “long way round” 2 guys do these trips on bikes. Pretty epic.

S65 > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. 08/29/2016 at 17:47

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Maniac

MultiplaOrgasms > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:48

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Once all the unnecessary bits have fallen off they will go on forever. It also has the same engine as a Clio Williams.

TheJWT > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:49

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100k on the dot.

not for canada - australian in disguise > TheJWT 08/29/2016 at 17:50

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There are certainly worse choices, and I didn’t say you had to get a car specifically.

duurtlang > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:51

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BRING IT ON!

1977 Peugeot 504 . R19500, so 80% of the budget still left for the following:

needs little panelbeating on centre post and roof...right side doors were damaged from accident

Better alternative: here . Only R 35000

TheJWT > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:51

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If I ever came into money I’d do exactly this.

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > InFierority Complex 08/29/2016 at 17:54

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Well there’s not enough moving or electronic part to go wrong, so that makes you right.

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > Die-Trying 08/29/2016 at 17:54

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I see you’re not a fan of Europe then.

MultiplaOrgasms > duurtlang 08/29/2016 at 17:55

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That choice is so Nigerian it hurts.

BorkBorkBjork > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:55

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The route you picked goes through West Africa, so there is only one natural choice:

Edit: Well, it kinda does avoid the worst of the worst, but Nigeria is no picnic.

InFierority Complex > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:55

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Over budget, but just look at it

http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-heavy-trucks…

12and35 > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 17:56

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James May it.

not for canada - australian in disguise > InFierority Complex 08/29/2016 at 17:57

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That’s it. Nobody’s topping this.

Probenja > duurtlang 08/29/2016 at 17:59

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I was going to post the same car, the “King of Africa”

Viggen > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 18:03

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So, after some looking, I’ve decided on either my trust steed, an XJ Cherokee or a Mini!

On the XJ I’d use the remaining money to modify it for overlanding and buying spare parts. The Mini I’d strip as much out as I could to sell and make some money back, and try to prepare it for its African conquest.

Probenja > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 18:05

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http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-cars-bakkies…

It’s called a Land Crusier, it was made for this.

InFierority Complex > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 18:17

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It’s basically a unimog with an armored, mine resistant cab, and 1800L of water in the back. It’s ridiculous and I want it now.

LongbowMkII > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 18:22

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Chery Tiggo 4x4.

You have your reliability. I’ll be busy getting ratings!

Die-Trying > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. 08/29/2016 at 18:25

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the southafrican craigslist site was.......... challenging. so it was the range rover......... or a vw bug, or a 2cv(if i can spot one). i ALWAYS pick the bug. i LIKE the bug. but for the crap roads of south africa.........i like the 4x4.........

anyhow, once the trip makes it OUT of africa i can use the can-opener (axe) on the roof to go full convertible, and enjoy the weather(RAIN)...........

The Crazy Kanuck; RIP Oppositelock > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 18:28

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A M35 deuce and a half with a MultiFuel engine. It could run on donkey piss, you could convert the back into a camper, and look great.

Dusty Ventures > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 18:33

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Pajero. If it’s good enough for Dakar it’s good enough for me.

http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-cars-bakkies…

BorkBorkBjork > InFierority Complex 08/29/2016 at 18:54

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Well, one thing, when you start getting into Northern Nigeria.

zipfuel > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 19:12

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I reckon the old tank-like Mercedes is still the classic way to go.

Everyone’s seen Long Way Down by now right?

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long_Way_…

Think I’m due a rewatch actually

Dogapult > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 19:20

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That’s quite a lot of money for something like this. Although I suppose you’d want to make sure it all worked.

Question semi-related: If you bought a car in Europe, but you lived in the USA, how would you register and insure it to drive around Europe?

RT > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 19:43

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So inappropriate, it’s appropriate:

http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-cars-bakkies…

RT > duurtlang 08/29/2016 at 19:49

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Almost chose this, myself. Very East-African.

interstate366, now In The Industry > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 20:15

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Rare VTEC yo

http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-cars-bakkies…

not for canada - australian in disguise > interstate366, now In The Industry 08/29/2016 at 20:26

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Our friend Manuel, we meet again.

zipfuel > zipfuel 08/29/2016 at 20:27

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That’s the ticket; 1982 mercedes w123, manual gearbox R7,000 plus the cost of a battery to drive it away...

http://www.gumtree.co.za/a-cars-bakkies…

Dru > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 20:28

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That Hilux is actually a pretty good candidate for import.

CaptDale - is secretly British > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 20:31

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Diesel Jaaaaaagggg !

I mean it isn’t the one I want which would be the Jaguar XJ 2.7tdvi

GTCL > not for canada - australian in disguise 08/29/2016 at 21:36

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Ewan McGregor did the opposite on a BMW motorcycle. He want from the top of Scotland to Cape Town. He made a documentary while doing it. It’s called Long Way Down. It was on Netflix, not sure if it still is. It was one of the few vehicle related things my wife would watch. We watched it after watching his earlier Long Way Round, which was also excellent.

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > Die-Trying 08/30/2016 at 07:57

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No no, I mean that by picking that, you hope not to make it to Europe. You’ll inevitably break down for good half way through Africa.

Die-Trying > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. 08/30/2016 at 10:27

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no , no , its okay, the ad says

“Hi all. I’m. Selling my Range Rover. Car is in everyday use. Drives like a dream. Gearbox and transfer box whas redone not to long ago carbs have bean service today. What it all have.

Roof rack

Spots Awning

Bull bar

Ramsey wince

Body lifted

Cooper discovery STT tyres new still can go a nother few years.

A beast of a car. Can go anywhere. Not this is a expedition car not to drive in town like I do. This baby what’s to see places. It’s a get in and go. I’m very sad to sell him. . It have memories and story’s

Best suspension every built

Great off road car Brand new spear wheel tyre and rim Please contact me if interested or for more info and pictures Asking price R45k. Or nearest cash offer. Don’t be scared to make a good over ”

this guy wouldnt lie to me, in south africa,...........i better check on what the chase car is going to be.......... hope its a vw bug.............

BiTurbo228 - Dr Frankenstein of Spitfires > not for canada - australian in disguise 09/06/2016 at 06:58

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As this is a personal dream of mine to do (except that I’d drive it back to where I live in the South of the UK), I’d have to pick an Alfetta saloon.

Quite a few of them left knocking around in SA. I’d probably spend any remainder of the budget swapping in a 3.0l V6 and retarding the timing so it doesn’t detonate itself from crap petrol on the way back.